| Sunday, March 18, 2007 |
|
was blog hopping till i came to this blog.. this guy reminded me much about myself in the past, dying for love- love sick.. thinking of you day and night, without u knowing.. back then, u were so busy with ur life.. its the same for you now. you wont care how much i was feeling, u didnt care at all! not even a message was send to me.. i waited day and night for ur sms, for your reply.. none came, NONE! .. and now, u're asking me back, back to you.. back to somewhere wher i've done so much, trying to get ur attention, somewhere where i was deeply hurt! what do u want from me, seriously? WHAT?! i had HAD ENOUGH of this kind of life, darkness. im not a puppet.. not a toy for ur enjoyment, when u're happy, im lucky enough to get ur replies.. not happy, u ignore me.. seriously, what am i to you?! that is the question for you.. why ask me back? its really funny.. is it becos u cant find any one else to toy with? .. and if i were to go back, i'll be an idiot, a fool.. ytd you asked: how long more do you wan me to wait? heyy, hello...? who waits for who?! when i was waiting in great pain, u were enjoying urself! and now.. i'm about to fully recover, there u are! standing there at my doorway, burged into my room and want me back to you? how can i do it? how am i going to....? please! think THINK THINK!! think before u ask me anything, think before saying out some things that hurts alrights?! ..sincerity is what i want. faithfulness - yes please.. but u didnt give me any. i want to BUT i cant entrust my life in you once again! I CANT.. i fear, you were the one who hurt me this much, u are the one who brought darkness into my life.. a place where i tried my best to run. but no matter how much and where i run to, in all directions, im still in that SAME lonely and dark place. please, get away from me! this is not a place where i wan to be.. its NOT!! im SATISFIED with my life now, so please..-get lost? dont haunt me with those thoughts again! i'll be really grateful =] im cool, im fine =] no worries ppl~ haha! yupp~ just that life is DAMNdamn boring?! ahha~ agree?! yep~ i want to learn how to trust again, to dare to run and love!! to recognise my new existence; new life; new beginning =] but i feel so lonely.. everyday rot at home. ask friends out, either no reply, if not will sae - i not free, why dont say earlier~ thats them! no choice lorr, live with my own.. i'll be used to it.. hope so.. adapt adAPT ADAPT!!!! hahahahahahhaahha~ adapt to my new life, new beginning.. heh~ i feel so retarded. oh wells.. :) heartxbr0ken 19march07 0032hr |
