| Saturday, February 23, 2008 |
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firstly, COUSIN CALLED - ask me to lie to mom [which is my aunty] that she went out with me and not her friends. a no. of times this happened.. WHO AM I? what am i? YOUR SLAVE? ur TOY? secondly, came down from home, to grandma house. siblings changed, preparing to go out. had a piff with sister ytd. so din talk to her. when she went away, asked bro "wher are u all going?" he said going to mom's workplace ther to have dinner, to celebrate her belated birthday! WAHH, how would u feel? they din even asked u along. THEY DONT EVEN CONSIDER ME AS PART OF A FAMILY! who am i again? a non existant membeR?! WAS REALI DU LAN WITH HER OK! EVERYTHING SHE DO, SHE's RIGHT LAH. EVERYTHING WE DO, ALL WRONG! FUCK HER LAH! CB... let me give an example, help me install photoshop need me to exchange something in return - accompany her to go shopping for clothes, if not she wont help me. previously, back ache, help me crack my back, suddenli so nice to me eh. ok fine. IM HAVING EXAMS OK! cant u think for me?! i said alot of times i dont wan to go.. i dont want to go! but she kept pestering me.. in the end accompanied her to find her office wear. SHE's HAPPY. IM NOT~! took an hour to reach home. say take train, she dont wan. rather pay one trip than two, long way home lorr. DU LAN ask bro go buy birthday cake for mom, said 1kg- its big ok! den she said, buy cheap one. SGD 10+, 20 like that.. u wan 1 kg den u wan it to be so cheap. a bit off right? den when he came back, cos did ask bro to buy bubble tea mah. no pearl oso wan to complain. she said "still buy for what, waste my money." the cake wasnt nice, den say SHOULDNT have ASK U TO BUY... shud ask sis to go with u... u cannot see is it, some times when u buy something shud at least see its nice or not mah... ME TO YOU.. - YOU SO CLEVER YOU GO BUY URSELF LAH... HELP U BUY LIAO STILL AT THERE COMPLAIN WHAT SHIT! DAMN U LAH. last night ask u help open door nia, not happy ah. say i rather u dont come back lah. go home and stay lah. come here trouble me so much for what. if i did the same thing to her, i will get scolded. cos she thinks whatever she do is right. i shouted at grandma. she scold me. SHE SHOUT, ATTITUDE HER, CAN~ all she do is right! i do it, CANNOT! say see me lidat very du lan... aiya the best is i dont exist in this family lah... SHIT YOU! dont know what the world is coming to! HE IS ALWAYS BUSY. ok fine. i think this period is impt. exam time. i shall keep quiet! RELATIONSHIPS.. edwin - suddenli attitude, dont wan open up. den broke off. sihui - after arnd 2 yrs of rls, HE SAID HIS FEELING FADE! - i slap ur face ah jason - you playing or what? why do u have to disappoint ppl. zz FEL - parents don allow. make both the parties reali upset. HAPPY BELATED BIRTHDAY TO WALT, YIJIE and MUMMY~ heartxbroken 23 FEB 08 2007 |
| Wednesday, February 20, 2008 |
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WEeeeEee~ EXAMS ON FRIDAY! why should i be happy over this? o.o i am NOT THE LEAST PREPARED for it! ROARR~! gonna fail for sure~ sighh. hmmm, marailyn has got into MI - her choice. I'm glad for you girl~ `at the time sadd.. cos you're leaving us~ :( sorry couldn't wake up ytd morning. was reali tiredd.. having late nights recently [3+, 4+ am] - couldn't get to rest, all i do is to play. so, no BNF revision and last meal with you. :( Today, after revision, was supposed to rest at home the whole afternoon.. but i went out the whole day [playing], came back only at 8+ pm. TO TM WE GO, with sissy and doreen [ cousin]. cos she came over to stay for 2 days~ look for office wear for sissy~ something badd happened. IF i din follow them, IF my sissy din pester me to go... my dear friend will still be kept in the dark. all of us will~ but the one who got hurt most is this dear friend of mine. so its the right choice to be out there... i don't know what to do when i was stucked in that situation i hesitated for a moment.... all i thought of is to give him a call, and tell him what exactly i saw. and failed to think of the consequences. what if I recognize the wrong person? what will the consequences be? who am i? do i have the right to do this..? i am being noisey, a huge busybody~ my big mouth.. WHAT HAVE I DONE?! all these questions whirled in my head for quite a while.. I'm sorry if I've hurt you... but I just want u to know. for all that I've done.. its for your own good. you may blame me for telling you all these. you may doubt me.. but... all i could do is to save u from getting hurt deeper when u really come to know the truth.. please dont get so affected by it. focus on ur studies for NOW~ I didn't expect there's such people in the world. I'm being really naive, I'm wrong. We are all deceived by appearance.. There are all types of people in this world. its just that we haven't have an encounter with them that's all... nothing to add on. heartxbr0ken 20FEB08 2315 |
| Saturday, February 16, 2008 |
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i watched the hours pass by me.. time is flying reali fast. `moody, lethargic, restless. all i could do, is to stone in front of this screen. i feel like resting, just lie down and stop those stupid thoughts that is taking over me. i have no interest in doing anything. especially studies. no, dont ever ask me to do that. cos i really HATE* studying. current music: potter's hand heartxbr0ken 16FEB08 1817 |
| Tuesday, February 12, 2008 |
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hmm.. nvr do 5 psycho quizzes [2% each] and 1 french quiz [10%!!!] ): cos have been enjoying the cny break and havent done any of my work HAHA. so was rushing through my work ytd~ oh gosh! but only manage to finish one learning journal which consist of 300 words. it was quite tough o.o yupp~ COS WENT TO PLAY AUDITION!. suppose to play a few games, but ended up playing for an hour. zz, so by the time i stopped its alr 1am! :( den i have to memorise my french script cos today my roleplay will be accessed! OH MY TIAN~! im dying, i cant even get the pronouncation right! fail for sure! no class for the day. din go for 9-11 am class cos cudnt wake up! came at 12 and found out ther's no class. so i have to wait till 4 wher my french roleplay will start :( went to davin's blog and he stole this from shiyun. "Have you ever been in love? Horrible, isn't it? It makes you so vulnerable. It opens your chest & it opens your heart & it means that someone can get inside you & mess you up. You build up all these defenses, you build up this whole armour, for years, so nothing can hurt you, then one stupid person, no different from any other stupid person, wanders into your stupid life... You give them a piece of you. They don't ask for it. They did something dumb one day, like kiss you or smile at you, & your life isn't your own anymore. Love takes hostages. It gets inside you. It eats you out & leaves you crying in the darkness, so a simple phrase like 'maybe we should just be friends' or 'how perceptive' turns into a glass splinter working its way into your heart. It hurts. Not just in the imagination. Not just in the mind. It's a soul-hurt, a body-hurt, a real gets-inside-you-and-rips-you-apart pain. Nothing should be able to do that. Especially not love. I hate love." this is not a very good year. just a bad start for everyone. but ther's still a long way to go! so we'll just jia you and dont get so affected by the things that are happening around us! GANBETTE, JIAYOU! tmr's sk bd~ dont think too much kayy girl! we'll stand by you =DD that's all i have to say :) ciao~ Au Revoir! heartxbr0ken 12FEB2008 1324 |
